this moment cannot govern the next

Try as I might, I cannot write something here that will automatically apply when I am tested.
Each moment I choose anew.

But I can remember I am forever trying to capture the insight of a PM with the intention of applying it to the FM.
Giving myself pristine advice made of powerful stuff now, eloquently written, in the hope that I will listen to my own advice when the mood is low and I am confronted with a delectable choice of food.

It has never worked.

I have not once made it through even 7 days of pristine eating. 

there are many reasons for this lack of follow through

Mainly I do not believe

i.e. I do not really believe that my life will change and I will achieve my goals if I abstain entirely from the downer foods. And yet as I write this, I want to try. 
I blame it upon undefined goals. goals that are impotent, and not exciting enough. an unerlying current of belief that I am going to be interfered with by helen, and she will nto let me have what I want, so I may as well interfere with myself and be in control of that. and life interferes too. so in the end. like right now, i cannot finish this train of thought because my quiet space has been invaded. i never get the quiet space because i do not wake up early enough. i just want to run. right now, get out and run.
i have training videos to make. i am not in the mood for that. i want to go shopping. anything. walking. but not working. island hopping. eating. sleeping. reading. not work though. 
you get what you want by giving love. the tipping point is when you have 51% go(o)d feelings. then you get what you want, not by hard work, but by the grace of god. it is the law. i have yet to implement it. it inspires me, but I have not done it.

see my definition of hard work is when i do not have to overcome myself.
hard work is overcoming my low energy state; my negative feelings; my lethargy
hard work is lethargy; having to do actions in when I am lethargic.

And I am lethargic when I eat foods that are knowingly going to take me down. i do this why? because in that specific moment I have no vision, no belief, and i am so down that only junk can pick me up.

and so in this moment here I resolve never to eat junk food again.
not
ok, so try switch to >50% good feelings. notice, 100% is not required. Just 51%.
thinking good.
ok, so here is a good through that leads to a good feeling: I am a VWM.
I am a very wealthy , happy man.