Building the pipeline

When good things are happening in my life and my energy is wonderful know that it is the outcome of the pipeline flow. To keep the warm water flowing, maintain the discipline. There is no happiness without discipline.
Maintain the bandwidth:
1. Exercise
2. Food
3. Prayer
4. Kindness and compassion

Permission

I hereby permit myself, unilaterally, to believe in ideas that I know to be true without first discussing my ideas with other people (because if I do the ideas remain ideas, and do not become beliefs). 
I permit myself to do this because I am the only one in my world. I am the only one who lives in my world. And I am made by God. I am part of the original intention, the original vision, the original being that preceded the big bang.

So I am saying - "I trust myself"

I am saying - I am not trying to fool myself. I know when I am. I have confidence in myself. I have complete confidence. I know who I am, what I am, and why I am. No need to verify this with other people. God knows my thoughts, and God will guide me accordingly. I have complete faith in that. Not as in - God the old man with the white beard sitting up on the clouds. God as in the God that created me, and powers me up, and created life so that I could flow through it with perfect awareness.
So permit me to be free. Permit me to sail, to fly. TO celebrate. To love being here because I am me, and aware of it. Freedom is permission to believe wholly in ideas that I know to be true. Ideas that I have tuned into, that come from God, that are God. Because in no way am I separate from God. I am not God, but God is me. As in, I am part of the original knowing. I am here right now, knowing all of this, and it is beautiful because I am free from the chains of permesso. I am free to no longer seek verification of the truth of that which I know. That which I know is that which God has given me to know, it is that which I have tuned into. Such as this moment right now. I am tuned. And a little scared to say it. But God is not scared of me challenging him. God is not scared of me bruising his ego. God is not scared of me believing in total and utter bullshit. God knew that I would, and that it would still be part of the original vision, the original plan for Life on Earth. I know things Things that I have not permitted myself to live because I do not have approval of these things that I know from other people. So this is a big deal. As of today, 01 May 2014, I have entered a new realm. And I am grateful for it, and I am only beginning, and I am .

ps - IT IS NOT THAT i NEED OTHER PEOPLE'S PERMISSION - i NEED MY OWN! Permesso - granted :)

Generate happiness in as many moments as I can. For it is happiness that moves the mountains.

Never again until tomorrow

Overindulgence. Bad habit. Addiction. Bad eating.
I feel awful. I will never do this to myself again.
Until I feel well. then as a reward, I will let myself go
to the dogs again.

I am channeled through a matrix that I have chosen

I am channeled. But not really!
I am not the channel, and I am not the matrix, and I am indeed not even the energy that flows through the matrix. I am the uber-energy. I am the Awareness is all.The trick is to remember that. Because I identify very closely with my body, the energy that is flowing through my body. and once I identify, I forget. And once I forget, I go round thinking that I am tired, I am energsed, I am happy, I am sad. In truth, I am those things, for I am designed to identify and merge with the energy that I flow. But in the final analysis, I am awareness. So say I am aware that my energy is down. I have eaten like a pig, and I am feeling exhausted. My awareness itself is not exhausted, but I feel exhausted nonetheless. That is because in this world, I am a combination of awareness and energy. I am not pure awareness - but I can have moments when I am, and in those moments, I am very powerful in the sense that I can make a decision that is not on auto-pilot, and I can change the matrix that my energy flows through, and experience life differently. Beautifully.Happiness moves mountains. Be evermore aware of that. No matter the theory, in practice, Happiness is what moves the mountains. Always.

The matrix is a series of channels, some are open, some are closed. On or off. And that is my work, my creation. That is how God has empowered me. That is my God-Given power. My decisions are powerful indeed. This is how they become reality - by switching a series of switches on or off - a series of channels, open or closed. 

And this is no simple matrix. It is comprised of unlimited dimensions. And united, they form to display me as I am. 
My words turn switches on or off. My deeds do too. My thoughts, my emotions, all determine the switches. the intensity, the duration, the frequency, the pitch. and there is no pre-determined channel going forward. I was born with a given matrix, but with no limits to how I might change it. I am the energy that flows through the channel, and the outcome of the flow when it reaches reality as I see it - that is me, that is you, that is the world we live in. But that is not the world, period. The world is flowing constantly.

so what I am saying, what I am conveying, is this: I am energy, I am flow. We are all the same energy flowing, but we flow differently, according to the beliefs we hold to be true, and from there flow the emotions, the actions, the reality we experience.

Oops, I did it again

I am so annoyed with myself. Yesterday, riding high - today, crashing down chemically because I could not stand the high so I ate incorrectly, and ensured the high would crash and I would have to deal with chemicals instead of real life. I am such an irritating mechanism. I know everything, and I still insist on screwing up my energy.

Coffee hieroglyphics (similar to tea leaf discernment)

It's gold, but you can drink it

Marriage and romance

Love in marriage is seldom romantic. The relationship is governed by the question of money. It is a practical thing. Romance is not practical. Romance is idyllic. Infatuation is the bond at the beginning of a relationship. It is the sexual energy that brings us close. And then after that it is the practical stuff, that is not sexy. Love is closely related to survival in a married couple. You may find your wife sexy, but she will not be in the mood for sex because her mind is on the future, and the future depends on money. And money is a source of friction if there is too little. And if there is a lot, then there may be an imbalance of power. But I only know about to little. So there is a lot of friction, it is a constant, and it is always there.
Hollywood
I know Hollywood's portrayal of love is the romantic one, and even so, I find myself holding this to be the standard to strive for. Even though Hollywood does not reflect reality. Hollywood reflects the dream. But hark, it is a dangerous one, because it is a dream based on making movies, making money out of selling a story that people love to believe in. Even though I know Hollywood to be a story, it is a story I have accepted as true - i.e as based on 'the truth about love' when in fact, there is no such thing. there is God. God is love. Let that be my source of light and joy. and then when I interact with people, my relationships will improve.

Permesso!

The beauty of freedom of being is that I do not need to ask permission from others to believe in what I know to be true for me - as in - a powerful idea or insight that will change my life. .
However, I still find myself doing this on a subconscious level. As if I am waiting for someone to say "Apple, you really should believe in those ideas, because they are powerful and they are true, and you will be better off if you do."

So what ideas are there to believe in that would make me a better person. Stronger, and trustworthy of my word?

Belief that god is good?
Belief in God?
Living with the feeling of absolutely knowing that things are getting better and better every day and that the best is yet to come?
living with the constant expectation of best is coming my way? Delicious expectation?

Elon Musk has this innate knowing that he is destined to do great things... "his greatest attribute is an ingrained belief that he has a seemingly heavenly decree"

Alexander the Great believed he was invincible and indomitable.

I am the only one in my world. I am not Alexander or Elon. I am Apple. What do I believe? What would I like to believe?

I believe I am a great software designer. I believe my software products provide the best user experience and most functional output ever. I know software.

My weakest belief is that I need to please everyone around me, that I am responsible for their happiness, and that if they are unhappy and making waves, I must have done something wrong and I must fix it.
My assumption is that I must keep the peace if I want to be happy.
So if I am happy and wife comes along to fight with me, I must bow down and make her happy before I can resume my happy state.
Man, am I ever fucked!

The thing is - when I am attacked, I can get aggressive. And so I lose my happy state, my balance, my peace. and let's face it, wife is forever finding things that are wrong that are my fault. Not sure they are my responsibility, but in her eyes, I am to blame.
I need a strategy to deal with her level of unhappiness/disatisfaction.
and here is the thing - her list of demands is never ending, her list of complaints is un-ending.
So how do I deal with this?
I need a strategy.
1. I need distance.
2. I need to earn out - I need to have work that keeps me out and away. and money that keeps me safe from her complaints.

So software is the way.
Let me plan my product!