RUSH JOB NOT

HOW TO MAKE Something from nothing

this moment

This is the moment I have been waiting for.
this is what I live for.
Which moment is it that you live for?
In other words, all the rest are the moments that you are not living for; all the other moments are moments that you are not living, you are wasting.

I find myself rushing. I want to get to the moment. And my present moment is just another thing I must do so that I can get the the moment I have been waiting for.

Are all moments not equal?
In fact they are. But I make them unequal. Rushing is a waste of life.
true success is all moments are equal - equal in that they are all moments that I am aware of how great it is to be alive.

how do I do this?

In fact it is best to be practical about this, not esoteric - i.e. make a list.

So that I am aware of where I am in the list. Nothing on the list is a waste of time. Yes, some are more urgent than others. Some are more important than others. But if I am going the one thing, then I should be as alive doing the one as the other.

So list it.
And then know I will get to the rest.
And then I can rest in this moment. And enjoy this moment.

If you put off feeling successful until you are successful you will never be successful.
Feel it first.
Irrespective of current happenstance, feel it.
It is a decision. My decision. An independent decision.
Just feel GREAT!
Do not have a whole long to do list, and then wait to complete it until I grant myself permission to breathe. Breathe now. Direct me to feel strong, to feel great, before even one thing is done. I will do it.
A successful day is not one where I knocked off my to do list items.
It is one where I feel great about being here now, and then feel great as a I dance my way through the to do list.
Waiting for the list to complete is not a successful life lived. Feel great. I am here. I am one with God. Feel that, then go forth.
My happiness, my strength, my house, does not depend on a list, it depends on my granting permission. and permission is not dependent

on a list. It is a leap. Take it, be it. Feel it in my gut.

Driving along, minding my own business

OK, so today I was driving along with a long step ladder tied to my car rooftop.
I was driving on a narrow road, with hidden bends.
Behind me a little Golf decides to overtake with zero visibility on the blind curve ahead.
I hoot at him like non stop - he goes anyway and sure enough another car comes round the bend head on.
they narrowly miss.
I hoot at the Golf in one long parp, loud and long.
He brakes abruptly, I nearly go into him. the ladder nearly slides off the car.
He shows me the middle finger and continues driving.
I turn off to my destination, shaken and stirred.

I realise that whilst he was 100% at fault in terms of reckless driving, I am still 100% responsible.
After all - I was there. Perfect timing. I was there. He was there. On that road. Me with a ladder. Him with a stupid mentality.
But nevertheless. I was there.
Why was I there?

Because I needed this wake-up call.
I got it to remind me that it is not about being wrong or about being right. It is about mindset.
I was on a certain frequency. The wrong one.
Why?
I woke up, did yoga, meditated, had coffee.
So all fine.
But something inside me attracted this experience.
Let go. Let go of everything that is not pure love.
Be still. And let go.
Then what is left is love.

Setting me back

I know I am going to do it to myself again. But really, I wish I would not.

When I have 2 espressos:

1.       Yes I feel buzzed on the day.

2.       And then that night I do not sleep well. Restless, light sleep without rejuvenation.

3.       And then the next day I wake up late, fragile. Insecure. Shell shocked. Dizzy, weak. No strength, no power. Aged, wrinkled. No exercise. No will power.

4.       The time for will power is the time before I drink the poison. After that, I cannot cope. I am useless. Unhappy. Depressed. Too tired to be in Provence.

5.       I am destroying Provence with a second espresso.

Is it worth it?

No. Even with a high of yesterday? NO! Not worth it. It is like taking one leap up, and then falling down a flight of stairs. Bump bump crash to the bottom.

Undercurrent

5 mins of mediation has allowed me to become aware, and then face the constant undercurrent of negativity that flows through every moment of every day, sapping the joy of living my life in the moment, making me constantly anxious, sapping my energy.
The negative flow, the undertow, is the belief that I do not deserve this moment. I must work harder or I will lose this moment. I cannot be still. I must not be still or I will lose everything. I cannot sit back and enjoy the present moment, the circumstance I am in, or it will change and be lost forever in a maelstrom of lack.
the antidote is to remember this: just be the frequency I want. It takes discipline on all levels. Yes. at, sleep, exercise, mediate, talk nicely, listen carefully.
I feel vulnerable, that it is all too good to last.
OK. So use it. It presents itself to me. Use it as a reminder to resonate ever stronger!
Claim my strength, claim my wealth. Know my wealth. Mmm...

My strength is my frequency. My frequency is what I choose to resonate with.
So yes, there is the fear. But then use the fear, do not resonate with it - instead, resonate with strength, with wealth, with togetherness.